He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
