We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
You ruined the universe
Randomize
