I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
