I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
