She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
