Where are you?
In a non slutty way
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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