You can't special order awesome
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
