Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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