Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
