I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
