I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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