After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Randomize
