Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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