Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
