My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
