I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
