Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
