So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
