Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
