I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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