you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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