I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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