We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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