She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
