I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I could fuck to npr.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
