there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I AM VODKA MAN
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Everyone says I win the strip club
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
