Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
