Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
