I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
