His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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