Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Randomize
