she was so not down for the gang bang
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Randomize
