I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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