Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
