YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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