Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
