That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
