dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
