Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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