question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
