I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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