I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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