He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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