Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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