lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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