naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
