he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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