my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
