Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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