Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
